31 days

Today was just an amazing day. I'm coming off an exhausting weekend that feels like one big pool party BBQ not to mention we threw our son an amazing surprise 13th Bday that lasted 2 days (his first all nighter, a rite of passage for a new teen). Its tough to be social this close to a competition, but I managed to make it through 100% sticking to the plan. Its not a matter of hoping I don't slip, because I won't give in to temptation, but trying to not be a total bitch while hosting these eating/drinking festivals! Fortunately my friends are supportive and understanding, giving me moral support while sipping their glasses of chilled white wine and eating a smores.. LOL. My husband is still "smiling and waving" and avoiding me on low carb days..
Anyways back to my AMAZING day. It hit me today is 31 days until my 2nd Figure competition, and it just feels entirely different this time. I feel stronger, happier and more adjusted to this lifestyle. I have never trained harder for anything and it feels so good to be this dedicated. This isn't just working out and eating right, for me its a sport. You have to live and breathe this for months leading up to a show, and to be honest I love it. I love knowing what I'm doing in the gym or that I get an increase in carbs on my toughest training days. I love being able to do chin ups and things I see only guys do. I love pushing myself (or having my trainer push me) harder than I think I can go. Sometimes its actually hard for me to shut it off, I am better this time about actually "resting" on my rest days. I have been guilty of heading out for a run on a Sunday because I'm "bored"... And of course its amazing to see the physical changes in my body, to look better at 35 after 2 kids then in my 20's is quite an accomplishment. To not struggle with body image or never feeling good enough which has more to do with my emotional journey rather than the physical. I am ok with never being "perfect" because there is no such thing.
For the first time I am not comparing myself to anyone else. I am proud of me and what I've accomplished. I can appreciate someone doing the same thing and be inspired by their success. I am not saying this is easy because there are days when its really hard. I cried the other night, no reason just wanted to be normal, have a cookie and some wine and relax like everyone else. I choose to keep that to myself because this is a choice and I refuse to feel sorry for myself or act like I have to do this. I came back down and joined the group with my casein protein pudding (amazing amazing amazing, all protein no fat or sugar pre-bed treat, this is a saving grace to my training) and I was ok.
Today was leg day. Love training legs. Love getting more carbs after training legs. LOVE LOVE LOVE good carbs.
my workouts this week:
Monday-Total body kick in the ass functional day.
Tues- Cardio/core 50 min interval on stairmaster 100 steps per min 1 min, 70 steps per min 1 min for 50 min.
Wednesday- LEGS!
Thursday- 6am cardio, 11amCHEST/SHOULDERS/TRIS/ABS
Friday-6 am Cardio 11 am Back/Bi's
Saturday-hamstring/glutes/ABS cardio
Sunday-REST DAY